you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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