dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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