Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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