His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Randomize
