why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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