I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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