Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
