Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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