You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
