guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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