just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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