were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
