"it" just moved
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
His nipple licking is glorious
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