dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
