did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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