I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
