Midget sex pt 2 tonight
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
