Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
