Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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