Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
