Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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