I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i just google imaged poop.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
