Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
