Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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