White coat. Heels.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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