i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
