Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
