I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.