Your tits are I can't wait for
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
