We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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