Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
