Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
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