What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
