At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
