You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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