STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
