So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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