It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
