I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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