It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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