You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Farmville is her only friend.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
