I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
