Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i just had sex bonerless
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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