They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
