At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
