I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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