Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
