Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize