How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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