billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
